If you receive a text like this from friend, loosely translated it means “I’m severely shitfaced. Please take me home.” File under amateur drinker. #HowToDrinkProperly
Too much tequila at Uni Night is never a good thing. Especially when you realise you drunk-emailed your lecturer at 3am to explain why you hate their subject. If you don’t want to fail, maybe pass on the next round of shots. #HowToDrinkProperly
Apologetic cakes are a nice way to admit to behaving like a drunken dickhead. But once the damage has been done, cake doesn’t always remove the bad taste from people’s mouths. Water does though. Ensure your drinking is less chug-a-licious next time and your mate’s house won’t be decorated with nasty chunks of your pasta bake. Stay classy friends. #HowToDrinkProperly
If your friend's text messages read like they're texting with their elbows, they're probably fuckeyed and struggling to use their thumbs.
Find them, replace their phone with water and grab a cab. Good on you for being a classy mate. #HowToDrinkProperly
There is a four day weekend in front of you, which is why polishing off a few bottled of wine tonight will not put you in good stead for the next three days.
Remember legends, pace yourself and you'll be on the path to class. #HowToDrinkProperly
Is what you said at the start of the night. Keep cool on the gin and juice front and you are less likely to text that person saved under 'dickhead royale' tonight. #HowToDrinkProperly
If you think this third cask makes you better looking, think again before you drink again. #HowToDrinkProperly
DrinkWise Australia: How To Date Properly
If there's any glimmering hope of a second date, follow these drinking tips and date classy.
The How To Date Properly campaign was created by O.Romas
Save yourself the embarrassment and find yourself some tips to date classy here.
Blind Date | How To Date Properly
Being on a blind date and getting blind on a date are two entirely different things. Avoid the latter by drinking classy and dating properly. http://bit.ly/1taWpBG
Champagne | How to Date Properly
Drink properly, date properly and avoid potential... surprises.
Classy Dating Tip #24: If sending cheeky drunken snaps after a hot date is your forte, try drinking classy instead. It’ll ensure your vision is clear enough to send to ‘Deb’ in your contacts, instead of ‘Dad’.
Matching wine to food is a skill, not a challenge. Impress your potential lover, but not with how many chunks of vomit you can catch in your beard. Date classy.
Confidence on a first date is good. Dutch courage is discouraged. Steer clear of slippery nipples on dates to avoid drunk slobbering on actual ones.
Well done to those of you who dated classy this weekend. We all know getting pissed and pissing yourself at the bar are the efforts of a rookie drinker. That certainly isn’t you. Stay classy.